You can do it using XQuery
SELECT
  [TO] = t.XmlColumn.value('(ParameterValues/ParameterValue[Name/text() = "TO"]/Value/text())[1]', 'varchar(100)')
FROM YourTable t
/ is a child node navigation. [] is a predicate test on a particular node. So this looks for ParameterValues/ParameterValue which has a Name child with text TO and returns the Value child’s text.
Note the use of text() rather than relying on implicit conversion/atomization. Also .value needs to be guaranteed a single result, so needs [1]
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solved T-SQL get value from XML